A few days ago, the Guardian published a reader callout asking how much it costs to be single in the UK. We wanted to know how much single people pay for various things – from housing costs and bills to holidays and entertainment – and if they feel they are being penalised or are losing out financially when compared with couples or families.
It clearly touched a nerve: scores of readers got in touch, with many saying this was an issue they felt really strongly about.
Here’s what three readers of different ages told us.
‘It’s just not affordable to live alone’
When Calvin Kern moved to England from Germany at 14, he always imagined he would be able to afford to live on his own in his 20s. But since moving out of home, he has instead found himself in “crazy expensive house shares”. Rent is one of the many parts of Kern’s life that he feels he pays extra for because he is single.
“The rent in a house share these days is nuts compared with how it was a couple of years ago.
“I live in a house share with four others, and at the moment I’m paying £869 [a month], and then they are going to put this up to £950 in the next month for, literally, a room that’s not even in the city centre,” he says. “It’s just not affordable to live alone.”
Over the last few years he has found himself living further and further away from central London but paying the same rent – or more – for a room. “When I lived in Vauxhall, my landlords increased my rent by £300 in one year, which is crazy, right?”
Kern is keenly aware that for couples, their outgoings are not the same, and the costs that people in relationships can share stack up. “As a couple, you can share even small things like the Netflix subscription or Amazon Prime, which I pay for on my own.
“You can save a lot of money on food shopping, too. Obviously, if you’re able to share food – buy food together in bulk and cook together – then that will save a lot of money.”
At 23, his dad bought his first property by himself. For Kern, that is far from his reality. “I’m 22 now, and I’ve got a better job than my dad had when he was my age, yet he was still able to buy a house.
“It’s really tough and you start to think: ‘Oh, is it my fault? Should I be earning more?’ – that sort of thing.
“I’m not resentful of couples. If you’re in a relationship, live together, I think that’s a great thing. It just is a lot cheaper for them.”
Mabel Banfield-Nwachi
‘I pay the same for a hotel room as a couple’
Cath, 40, who lives in south Wales, estimates that her “comfortable but very far from lavish life” costs her, as a single person, “upwards of £10,000 a year more than if I had a partner”.
She adds: “The single supplement applies to everything, not just hotel rooms … The costs of the very basics of living are sky-high for a single person.”
Cath sold her house to escape noisy neighbours but her next purchase fell through at the last minute because of a terrible survey, so she now rents, paying £1,100 a month in rent and £170 a month in council tax, “and that is before utility bills, TV licence, etc”.
She adds: “If I rented my home and split all bills 50/50 with a partner (removing the 25% council tax discount), I’d probably save about £750 a month. That is a huge amount of money that I could save, invest, put in a pension or simply use to enjoy life that bit more. And I run a car, so every year I pay for road tax, breakdown cover, MOT, service, repairs, insurance by myself. That’s another several hundred pounds a year more.
“Look at railcards: there’s a discount for pretty much everyone except working adults who live alone. If I go on a trip, I pay the same for a hotel room as a couple would. Couples get a discount if they join the same gym. It’s ridiculous – society gives discounts for nice things to those who already have someone to share the cost of the essentials with.”
Cath says: “Politicians always talk about ‘hard-working families’… But we’ve got an ever-increasing number of people living alone. It just seems like it’s something that society should be talking about more; most people these days must know someone who lives alone.”
She adds: “Who’s going to provide a miracle solution to this? The answer is no one … Ultimately, I don’t torment myself by spending much time thinking about how much easier life would be financially if I had a good relationship and someone to share the ever-spiralling costs of living with. I have a few friends who are in far worse financial situations than me, so I have to think myself lucky.”
Rupert Jones
‘With water, I’m paying way above what I use’
Erica Wolfe-Murray has been single for 17 years after being married for 22 years, “so I’m well aware of all the hidden things you pay more for”.
The businesswoman, who lives near Oxford, says that what some have called the “singles tax” is something she feels very strongly about.
She says that one figure she saw put the cost of being single at about 30% more than being in a couple.
Wolfe-Murray says that when she reads magazine and weekend newspaper articles, “there’s rarely anything about single people – it’s all about couples. So you’re not only getting reinforcement of your lack of value in society, you are also having to pay more to live in that society.”
The list of areas where this is an issue is long.
“The daily standing charges for electricity and gas have to be paid – and you pick 100% of them up if you are single,” she adds.
Meanwhile, single-person households typically use less water. “Thames Water seem to be loth to come and fit a water meter. I know I’m paying way above what I use,” says the 65-year-old, who works in the creative sector helping companies to grow.
Plus, there never seems to be a discount for one person, whether it’s memberships, entry fees or whatever, whereas there is often a discount available for two people, she adds.
Wolfe-Murray has regularly been asked to pay a single supplement when booking a hotel room.
She says a hotel bedroom can often cost the same for a single person as for a couple, “whereas you are using half of the towels, water, overheads, etc (other than the sheets)”.
However, she has noticed that some hotels do seem to be stopping charging single supplements.
Talking of holidays, she recalls the time she visited Cuba a few years ago. “You could book rooms in people’s houses, which allowed homeowners to earn income from tourists to boost their minimal finances.” Travelling alone, she had booked a room in advance in the town of Viñales.
”When I got off the bus, I was greeted by a different person to the one I had booked with. She explained that I would be staying with her, as my original host had been offered four guests to stay in the room I would have occupied (therefore more money). The following night, I returned to the house to find my bags packed and loaded into a car in which I was driven to another house because my second host had been offered two guests for the nights I would have stayed.”
This room was effectively a converted lean-to next to a chicken run with dodgy wiring and water. “I was told that as a single traveller I was not worth much to anyone, so was lucky to have a bed at all.”
Rupert Jones